EXTRA JUICE: "My best friend got a boyfriend and has made little to no effort with me since then..." #48 — Hold My Drink

[00:00–00:04] Hold my drink, Extrudeuse, with Charlene and Ellie.
[00:04–00:08] A go-laid original podcast, proudly sponsored by pennies.
[00:08–00:12] Get this season's must-haves in a store near you.
[00:21–00:24] Welcome to our drink, Extrudeuse, with the county sponsor for primary for pennies.
[00:24–00:27] The ultimate highest you destination is everything you need this spring.
[00:27–00:30] Get your side out there and have some fun and celebrate yourself at primary.
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[00:37–00:39] I was in pennies twice in the last two days.
[00:39–00:40] You were?
[00:40–00:41] And I used a stock checker.
[00:41–00:43] Oh, how did you get on?
[00:43–00:44] Very good. It was right.
[00:44–00:45] What?
[00:45–00:47] Yeah! I got that at Dan and Middie's Gerrts.
[00:47–00:49] Oh, you're checking out the little one right here.
[00:49–00:50] Yeah, yeah.
[00:50–00:51] Cute. Got it. Yeah.
[00:51–00:52] I did a stock up in there last week.
[00:52–00:53] Yeah.
[00:53–00:55] It's great. It's very spring vibes.
[00:55–00:58] Before we went, before we went to airport, I went in for,
[00:58–00:59] Oh, yeah.
[00:59–01:01] Those little cosmetic pots travel with.
[01:01–01:02] Oh, yeah.
[01:02–01:05] And I sent 1019 Euro later.
[01:05–01:07] Oh, my God. What else did she get?
[01:07–01:09] Lodge! That's great.
[01:09–01:10] It was great.
[01:10–01:13] Standout with primary is spring 2020, 23 collection.
[01:13–01:15] The range is characteristically cool.
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[01:22–01:24] Did you know you can also check what is in your local store?
[01:24–01:27] On the primary website with their new stock finder as well.
[01:27–01:29] The surely was just mentioning.
[01:29–01:30] It's so handy.
[01:30–01:32] But sure, we're always popping in out pennies anyway.
[01:32–01:34] If you forget to use it, you can just put it in.
[01:34–01:37] I would have walked by that skirt if I didn't know it was there.
[01:37–01:38] If it was there.
[01:38–01:39] Yeah.
[01:39–01:41] Because you don't realise what I knew I was looking for it.
[01:41–01:42] So it was on your mind.
[01:42–01:43] Yeah.
[01:43–01:46] Take a log on to www.pymerc.com.4.se.
[01:46–01:49] Check out all the spring pieces and see what in your local store
[01:49–01:51] with their new stock finder.
[01:51–01:54] This is a brown set episode where we answer even more of your dilemmas.
[01:54–01:56] I love when I see updates.
[01:56–01:57] Oh, I'm scared.
[01:57–01:58] Why?
[01:58–01:59] No, I don't know.
[01:59–02:00] I think there was a weight on updates.
[02:00–02:02] When I say hi girls, you fucked up my life.
[02:02–02:04] I think I fucked up someone's life.
[02:04–02:05] They'd stop listening maybe.
[02:05–02:06] I'm wouldn't give up.
[02:06–02:08] Yeah, we just feel like fuck them.
[02:08–02:14] Okay, the first update is in brown set episode 38 we answered this dilemma.
[02:14–02:18] So the dilemma is I've been single for five and a half months.
[02:18–02:20] I was at my ex for almost three years and I came home after night out.
[02:20–02:22] One night and he ended things for me.
[02:22–02:25] Whilst I was drunk and said he hadn't loved me for months and I since
[02:25–02:27] haven't heard one word from him.
[02:27–02:33] I had a breath so much excitement towards him as I feel the way his moment sister got involved in the breakup.
[02:33–02:36] He was back on Tinder there after he split and this genuinely broke me.
[02:36–02:40] Fast forward a couple months, I had started seeing this other boy, seven years older and had a child.
[02:40–02:43] And even the back of my head, it wouldn't work as his child.
[02:43–02:46] He had a child a lot and there wasn't really a lot of time made for us.
[02:46–02:48] I saw passes for a bit and things were going well.
[02:48–02:52] I had a gut feeling when I was out with my friend and ended up seeing him when another girl.
[02:52–02:56] I got fronted him and he never even replied to the message which resulted in me blocking him.
[02:56–02:58] Even though I don't even see him a few months.
[02:58–03:00] I felt like this has really gended myself confidence.
[03:00–03:04] I'm getting super excited and going to bed most nights very early and try to sleep early.
[03:04–03:08] So I'm not up most of night upset and overwhelmed which I feel I'm gonna do.
[03:08–03:13] A few boys tried to speak into me and I'm trying but I feel terrified that my guard down because of a cum serious with anyone.
[03:13–03:17] Due to past things that have happened and the possible hair braid that comes along with it.
[03:17–03:19] Our advice was oh god.
[03:19–03:22] Give it time and one day you realize that the pain is gone.
[03:22–03:24] You don't feel hurt or resentment on one day.
[03:24–03:27] You'll be open to being a certified lover girl again.
[03:27–03:29] And she said hi girls.
[03:29–03:32] Thank you so much for reading this out and give me advice.
[03:32–03:34] Safe to say I was sobbing when you read the video.
[03:34–03:35] Oh!
[03:35–03:38] To hear that this was hair wise feeling for so long.
[03:38–03:41] It was such a sad thing to hear I've come so far since then.
[03:41–03:44] Oh she obviously sent it a few weeks prior to us reading it out.
[03:44–03:45] Oh yeah yeah yeah.
[03:45–03:48] It was so good to hear your advice from an unbiased perspective.
[03:48–03:50] So thank you thank you thank you for your advice.
[03:50–03:52] Your brother's self are relatable.
[03:52–03:54] Fast forward to now I'm a certified lover.
[03:54–03:55] Wooo!
[03:55–03:56] Oh my god.
[03:56–03:57] I like she running.
[03:57–03:58] Wooo!
[03:58–03:59] I'm running in girl.
[03:59–04:00] Ha ha.
[04:00–04:05] Talked your advice and went into this feeling a bit wary but not with my guard hype.
[04:05–04:09] As I know I'm my only ruin it from me being anxious by past experiences.
[04:09–04:12] I've learned so much about myself and still on somewhat of a healing journey.
[04:12–04:13] Does this ever end?
[04:13–04:14] No.
[04:14–04:15] My new boyfriend is a wee angel.
[04:15–04:18] Is so understanding of my social issues and constantly reassures me.
[04:18–04:22] Feels so nice to get back to feeling happy again after my healing journey obviously.
[04:22–04:24] As Ellie said we're thriving.
[04:24–04:26] Your advice was so donated and very appreciated.
[04:26–04:27] Thank you for this girl.
[04:27–04:28] Oh!
[04:28–04:33] So in episode 69 of the main podcast we answered this dilemma.
[04:33–04:37] Met this girl a year and a half ago, fell in love with her personality and quickly became my best friend.
[04:37–04:41] She became part of my friendship group, all because of me and even became a holiday's voice.
[04:41–04:45] Over the summer she'd be closer to one of the girls and I was happy for her until I was almost pushed out.
[04:45–04:50] She also hates my boyfriend of four years, the only person in my life over the past four years that hasn't liked him.
[04:50–04:52] She wants to go, why am I reading this out again?
[04:52–04:53] I don't know, you know what?
[04:53–04:54] I just keep going.
[04:54–05:00] She wants to go, she sat me down while I was at work and said she needed a break from me and only me.
[05:00–05:02] That she didn't want to be around me and doesn't have the energy from me.
[05:02–05:03] I remember this one.
[05:03–05:04] This is only recently.
[05:04–05:05] Is it?
[05:05–05:06] Yeah.
[05:06–05:10] Since she's had no contact with me, no text and I invite it all and I'm constantly watching my back and feeling unwanted.
[05:10–05:12] Went with the group because she just wanted to be around me.
[05:12–05:14] Oh, is this one of her work?
[05:14–05:15] No, actually nevermind.
[05:15–05:21] She completely shattered my confidence and made me feel as though I wasn't enough and that she has taken what she needed from me.
[05:21–05:23] Okay, new friends and now doesn't need me anymore.
[05:23–05:28] Coding her off completely, you could have run the risk of losing one of my longest friends who she'd become closer with.
[05:28–05:29] I do, yeah, yeah.
[05:29–05:33] Our advice was say to the girls first as you were their friend first.
[05:33–05:37] If there are a lot of friends to you that understand situation, it should make a case of picking between people.
[05:37–05:38] Okay.
[05:39–05:40] And here's the up day.
[05:40–05:43] Hey words, it was amazing to hear my words and my situation out loud.
[05:43–05:46] It made me feel like it wasn't in my head and I burst into tears.
[05:46–05:48] Oh, the fire's out of crime.
[05:48–05:52] I think that makes me feel like validated like their feelings are.
[05:52–05:54] Yeah, you know what I mean?
[05:54–05:58] I mean, I'm present here as here in your advice because I knew I need to stand up to the rest of the girls.
[05:58–06:01] Since then I spoke to my friends and the one girl I was worried about was pulled away.
[06:01–06:07] The rest of my friends are now seeing her hard to ask for me and how much I struggled because they are now almost in the same situation.
[06:07–06:09] Now I'm focused on myself, my friends.
[06:09–06:12] I decided the group that are so good for me, my most boyfriend.
[06:12–06:16] 23 is not a space for people who aren't adding positive values to our lives.
[06:16–06:19] And I'm on my journey back to being confident in myself.
[06:19–06:22] Thank you so much for all your advice, little V. Millions.
[06:22–06:24] Oh, it's like I was gone.
[06:24–06:25] Basically, yeah.
[06:25–06:26] Yeah.
[06:26–06:27] Yeah.
[06:27–06:28] Took the trash out, boy.
[06:28–06:30] She walked the trash out herself.
[06:30–06:31] Yeah.
[06:31–06:32] No way.
[06:32–06:33] What the trash takes itself, yeah.
[06:33–06:35] Oh, God, we're not calling her trash, but she was me.
[06:35–06:36] She was horrible.
[06:36–06:37] Yeah, she wasn't very nice.
[06:37–06:38] No, no.
[06:38–06:39] No, no.
[06:39–06:40] Okay.
[06:40–06:47] And then the last update that we have for you was from Bowen's episode 41.
[06:47–06:50] So the dilemma we answered is hi girls.
[06:50–06:52] I live in a small town and got to a small local gym.
[06:52–06:54] I work from home and use my lunch hour.
[06:54–06:56] I remember this to go to the gym.
[06:56–06:57] Oh, yeah, me too.
[06:57–06:58] Get to meet your ass today with the host.
[06:58–07:00] This is where the fella kept talking to me.
[07:00–07:01] Yeah.
[07:01–07:04] It was all fine until about three months ago when I randomly got chatting to a guy.
[07:04–07:05] We seemed.
[07:05–07:08] We seemed to be at the gym at the same time every day.
[07:08–07:14] So I started with a simple high her area, but as the day goes on, it ends up being a 15 or 20 minute conversation.
[07:14–07:18] As my lunch hour, it's wasting so much time and not getting a good workout in as.
[07:18–07:19] And it's really starting to get to me.
[07:19–07:20] It's not a flirty conversation.
[07:20–07:23] So I think he just wants to be friends with at the same time.
[07:23–07:26] He hasn't added me on any kind of social media.
[07:26–07:30] I feel like it's gone on for too long now and I don't know how to stop the conversation.
[07:30–07:37] So we'll consider changing the time I go, but when ex boyfriend goes to the same gym and I'd rather avoid my ex than this other guy.
[07:37–07:41] As I said, I live in a small town and the other closest gym is about 15 minutes drive away.
[07:41–07:45] I don't want to be mean to this guy because I get the impression he might be lonely.
[07:45–07:46] My heart doesn't able.
[07:46–07:51] So the advice that we gave was say to him that you'll talk to him at the end of the workout.
[07:51–07:56] That way you have an excuse to leave earlier to get back to work and not stay chatting for 15 to 20 minutes.
[07:56–07:58] So the update is.
[07:58–08:07] So ladies before I even got the chance to get your advice things took a turn for the worst family and Instagram and sent me a message saying can we chat here while we're not in the gym.
[08:07–08:09] But he never sent me a follow request.
[08:09–08:12] I didn't reply and ended up avoiding the gym for a while.
[08:12–08:17] I still have to fear running into him after gym or anywhere around the town.
[08:17–08:18] Anymore advice.
[08:18–08:19] I know.
[08:19–08:23] Is this the people please are in me just not knowing how to say no.
[08:23–08:29] I think it's a very girl thing that we nearly feel bad sometimes when you're not.
[08:29–08:32] When you don't want someone like that but you shouldn't feel bad.
[08:32–08:35] I have to imagine a man feeling bad about that.
[08:35–08:40] Sometimes you actually have to say I don't actually feel more my feelings more important than that man.
[08:40–08:41] Yeah.
[08:41–08:44] Put your own feelings forward first.
[08:44–08:46] Oh god he didn't add your body's sent it message.
[08:46–08:47] Weird.
[08:47–08:49] Does he know how to use Instagram?
[08:49–08:50] Has he got to see you good girl?
[08:50–08:51] Oh shit yeah.
[08:51–08:53] Can you see who they follow?
[08:53–08:54] Oh god.
[08:54–08:57] Thank you for them update.
[08:57–09:00] So, I don't know if you'll be back in the gym anytime soon.
[09:00–09:06] I know, but if he is, I got just even smiling away for something, don't be glad if you don't talk to him.
[09:06–09:07] No, I'm actually really busy.
[09:07–09:08] Yeah, yeah.
[09:08–09:11] Yeah, it's not your job to keep from an entertain for the day.
[09:11–09:14] And if you don't want to talk, it's a waste of your time in a way.
[09:14–09:17] Although we did feel bad from who's nice, but we're just too nice.
[09:17–09:22] You can also feel bad from a distance and be nice, but don't be overly nice.
[09:22–09:22] Yeah, you're right.
[09:23–09:27] So all of those dilemmas will have been sent to our email address, which is
[09:27–09:29] homadrinkacolordown.com.
[09:29–09:32] They were all updates, and these are dilemmas from this week.
[09:32–09:35] Okay, so the first dilemma that we have is,
[09:35–09:39] hi girls, just one star per se, and I adore the two years and have never missed an episode.
[09:39–09:40] Jesus, for a pleasure.
[09:40–09:46] And so happy you, so happy you use our hope, the fellas, our lovely girls, and better than the last,
[09:46–09:48] Ellie, you deserve the world.
[09:48–09:49] Oh, my fellas, the saying.
[09:49–09:49] Yeah.
[09:50–09:52] Surely there's a re-page fella.
[09:54–09:54] Okay.
[09:55–09:59] I was in my ex for two years, and we were constantly breaking up the whole time.
[09:59–10:02] Cheat none his part, and the whole relationship was just a shit show, to be honest.
[10:02–10:04] But I never saw myself getting over him any time.
[10:04–10:06] We broke up, and it lasted for a while.
[10:07–10:10] I was in the absolute terrors, as you can imagine, but I did end up moving on.
[10:11–10:14] I was getting with his lads since me and my ex ended, I'm not serious at all.
[10:14–10:18] Just on a night out, not even home, not even home, after together.
[10:19–10:24] The odd time he would come over to mine, and we'd get together, but never went further than a kiss.
[10:24–10:28] He told me on a recent night out that he doesn't want a relationship, and neither did I,
[10:28–10:29] until he said he didn't.
[10:31–10:35] Now that's been two months since we last got together, we still flirt and everything,
[10:35–10:41] and I always chat and I see him, but he'll be so dry for a few days, and then flirt in the
[10:41–10:43] ballaks off me the rest.
[10:43–10:47] I know I'm really starting to get feelings for him, but I don't want to settle for another lad
[10:47–10:52] that isn't going to show me, he cares about anything like that, and also the whole,
[10:52–10:53] he doesn't want a relationship thing.
[10:53–10:59] I really do not know what to do, because I fear he wants me, but then sometimes I do.
[10:59–11:01] He so opened the air, what the fuck do I do girls?
[11:05–11:08] Like the fact that you only want to be with him, because he doesn't want to be with you,
[11:08–11:10] it's just that's just your ego talk, and I love that.
[11:10–11:11] I love it so much.
[11:11–11:12] I find it really exactly.
[11:12–11:14] Yeah, but it's also just your ego talk and that.
[11:14–11:16] You're like, well I want to be with him.
[11:16–11:20] Yeah, you're like, I want to, but now I want to be with him like, why would you not want to be with me?
[11:20–11:21] Yeah, that's what it is.
[11:21–11:24] You should want to be with me like, yeah, sort of make him be with you.
[11:24–11:26] Yeah, yeah, oh god.
[11:29–11:33] I think you're already telling yourself how much energy has gone into him.
[11:33–11:36] Yeah, and like, you're not getting the benefits of it.
[11:36–11:41] No, and like open the air works if you want something casual and you like that thing,
[11:41–11:43] but like open the air doesn't work when you actually want a solid.
[11:43–11:47] I fell, yeah, yeah, and you've seen like you do, but
[11:48–11:52] I just ask him, he's already told you just want to release him.
[11:52–11:59] Yeah, I think he's giving you all the answers as horrible and like brutally honest as that is.
[11:59–12:02] She's saying, I feel he wants me.
[12:02–12:04] Don't assume things like that.
[12:04–12:05] I know we like to say on the best.
[12:05–12:07] We love, yeah, they all want to do it.
[12:07–12:10] Yeah, but like, what's it shown?
[12:11–12:13] He was actually seem like it.
[12:13–12:16] A lot more actions we've loved a little more.
[12:16–12:18] Then you're dilulu.
[12:18–12:24] Yeah, I think he needs to branch out.
[12:24–12:27] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[12:27–12:29] It's one thing you question, like it's fine if you're just,
[12:29–12:31] if you're like, oh, that's really annoying, like it's probably just keep going.
[12:31–12:34] I would have actually sat near when you're like, I really would like to be with him.
[12:34–12:37] Yeah, if you were just seeing him, if both of you are on the same page,
[12:37–12:39] it'd be different because you're on two completely different pages.
[12:39–12:42] Yeah, it's very hard to be on the same page as someone.
[12:42–12:45] Yeah, oh, sorry, it's hard to be on different pages, but like
[12:45–12:46] seeing someone exactly.
[12:46–12:50] Yeah, you need to be on the same page where it's half way much done.
[12:50–12:51] Because someone's going to end up being serious.
[12:51–12:52] Yeah.
[12:52–12:55] And then, even if I don't have to send it then, I feel.
[12:55–12:56] Yeah, so...
[12:56–12:58] You put it in the board while you can now.
[12:58–12:59] Yeah, yeah.
[12:59–13:02] It might just be one of the drunken things that is together,
[13:02–13:03] if not Nelson's happens.
[13:03–13:07] And like, sometimes things they'll can start from when you say, I don't want to race you.
[13:08–13:11] I think what I'm going to tell them, what do I do?
[13:11–13:11] You're right.
[13:11–13:12] I'm an imprellent.
[13:12–13:13] Yeah, you're my dinner.
[13:13–13:14] Yeah.
[13:14–13:16] So, like, sometimes that is the case.
[13:16–13:17] Yeah.
[13:17–13:20] But I'll also take them for what he's telling you.
[13:20–13:21] Yeah, actually.
[13:21–13:22] Yeah.
[13:22–13:23] Might have to get in time.
[13:23–13:23] I love this.
[13:24–13:27] Did you put on white runners after putting French runners on the...
[13:27–13:28] Yeah, I was on the...
[13:28–13:29] Why was it like this thing?
[13:30–13:31] Not transferred at all.
[13:31–13:33] Do you have on your ankles?
[13:33–13:33] Yeah.
[13:33–13:34] That's not on it?
[13:34–13:34] No.
[13:35–13:36] Gosh, how you thought it was?
[13:36–13:38] I did add them up different.
[13:38–13:38] Very good, yeah.
[13:38–13:38] Yeah.
[13:38–13:41] Good way to do that now.
[13:41–13:43] Um, yeah.
[13:44–13:45] I don't think you said it yourself.
[13:45–13:47] You don't want to settle for another lad that isn't going to show you.
[13:47–13:48] He cares about you.
[13:49–13:52] So, take your own advice and that's it.
[13:52–13:53] And just go what you've shown.
[13:55–13:56] Next one is, hi girls.
[13:56–13:58] I hope you can give me some advice.
[13:58–14:00] My best friend got a boyfriend and started the year and has made little
[14:00–14:02] snow effort since then.
[14:02–14:05] Anytime she makes an effort to make plans, it's because he's busy at work or not
[14:05–14:06] around.
[14:06–14:07] Make me feel like a second option.
[14:07–14:09] I work a full-time job and I'm...
[14:10–14:12] I'm parents time in college and I have a boyfriend up my own.
[14:12–14:15] So it's hard for me just to be able to see her when she decides to be in for her.
[14:16–14:19] If I tell her I don't feel up to plans, it's always come on and be fun.
[14:19–14:21] Or if I don't have the money she has and turns up,
[14:21–14:22] borrow off my mom.
[14:22–14:25] She can't take no for an answer and just constantly do what suits her.
[14:25–14:28] I love her so much but I just can't get through to her with this.
[14:29–14:30] Love the podcast, Chris.
[14:30–14:34] We've definitely talked with that before that like the honeymoon stage of someone
[14:34–14:35] getting in a relationship is bound to happen.
[14:36–14:36] Like,
[14:37–14:40] you're so excited to have this person in your life and like,
[14:40–14:43] you want to always be with them and always spend time with them and...
[14:45–14:49] Yeah, so you can't fall down that half but I do also understand it then from the other half of
[14:49–14:51] where the girl is coming from.
[14:51–14:52] Where the friend is coming from.
[14:52–14:52] Yeah.
[14:52–14:54] Feeling like an option kind of thing.
[14:54–14:54] Yeah.
[14:56–14:57] Is this...
[14:57–14:58] It depends for us, boyfriend.
[14:58–14:59] No, I'm just saying.
[14:59–15:00] Got a boyfriend.
[15:00–15:01] Yeah.
[15:04–15:05] What would you say?
[15:07–15:08] I don't know.
[15:08–15:09] Like, I think the thing of like...
[15:11–15:13] I don't think she's meaning the bad way is when she's saying,
[15:13–15:15] come on, let me phone about plans.
[15:15–15:16] Yeah.
[15:16–15:17] I'll take no for an answer.
[15:17–15:18] I don't think she's meaning that like,
[15:18–15:20] trying to force is probably just does want to see it.
[15:20–15:21] Yeah.
[15:21–15:23] But it's also annoying if it's only at her convenience.
[15:23–15:24] Yeah.
[15:24–15:24] And I...
[15:24–15:25] I don't think it's worth for the two years.
[15:25–15:26] Yeah, I think so too.
[15:26–15:27] Like, it's just...
[15:29–15:31] I think say that too when she asks me next time,
[15:31–15:32] like, I can't do this,
[15:32–15:34] but I have been trying to make plans in the other one of the rounds.
[15:34–15:36] I can't do things at the drop of a hat like you can.
[15:36–15:37] Yeah.
[15:37–15:38] Like, I'm actually really busy.
[15:39–15:42] And maybe come to some sort of compromise of like,
[15:42–15:44] right, here's a date we'll do some on this date.
[15:44–15:47] A date that suits the boat instead of just in the moment
[15:47–15:48] or on the day,
[15:48–15:49] vortexing and being like,
[15:49–15:51] let's do this nail bar money after my arm blabber.
[15:52–15:54] Because when you're a full-time job and part-time college,
[15:54–15:54] like,
[15:54–15:56] NFL, you don't have that time.
[15:56–15:56] Yeah.
[15:56–15:58] They just leave.
[15:58–15:59] So at least if the two years come together
[15:59–16:01] and plan something for the future,
[16:01–16:03] it also gives you both something to look forward to as well.
[16:03–16:03] Yeah.
[16:04–16:04] Yeah.
[16:04–16:05] I mean, so do I.
[16:05–16:07] And then no one's let down this point just.
[16:07–16:07] Yeah.
[16:07–16:09] Because you set a date and then someone bears on that then.
[16:09–16:11] Then what can you really do?
[16:11–16:11] Yeah.
[16:11–16:12] That's almost as old.
[16:12–16:13] Yeah.
[16:14–16:16] The last one that we have then is
[16:16–16:18] well-shurling and Ellie, how are you?
[16:18–16:19] This question is more for Ellie.
[16:19–16:22] But just wondering how did you deal with the passing
[16:22–16:25] over the lovely tailor and how did you agree for her?
[16:25–16:28] I unfortunately lost my best friend very unexpectedly
[16:28–16:29] and don't know what to do.
[16:29–16:31] I'm last-day with her and also really her,
[16:31–16:35] I've broken any advice or coping ways.
[16:35–16:35] Much appreciated.
[16:35–16:36] Thank you.
[16:38–16:39] That's so soft.
[16:43–16:46] We didn't lose tailor kind of.
[16:48–16:52] We kind of knew it was the last few weeks.
[16:52–16:52] What do I kind of think?
[16:52–16:53] Yeah.
[16:53–16:54] A tailor was 12.
[16:54–16:55] That's really old for a boxer.
[16:58–16:58] Yeah.
[16:58–16:59] So we kind of knew.
[17:00–17:02] We knew it was on the way.
[17:02–17:03] So I think we kind of all mentally prepared
[17:03–17:05] us that for that first.
[17:05–17:05] I was away.
[17:05–17:07] I think I was away.
[17:07–17:09] My mom is sitting here from Fuse-Renishland.
[17:09–17:12] I was away and I came back on the Sunday
[17:12–17:13] and Taylor died on the one day.
[17:13–17:14] That's a New York.
[17:14–17:15] Was it New York?
[17:15–17:15] Yeah.
[17:15–17:18] I think I came home the day before.
[17:18–17:23] And yeah, everyone at home was just saying
[17:23–17:26] it's just not fair for her to be.
[17:27–17:30] Like we were just keeping her there for us kind of.
[17:30–17:32] For our own selfish reasons just to say,
[17:32–17:33] oh, she's still there.
[17:33–17:34] Like it was just a low cutter.
[17:34–17:36] And then on the other half, I'm like,
[17:36–17:39] why did we, why did we want to look at her in that state?
[17:39–17:41] We didn't want to remember her like that.
[17:41–17:41] Yeah.
[17:41–17:45] So we made the call and to bring her for the rest.
[17:45–17:46] And that was that.
[17:46–17:50] But we dealt with it in a very different way
[17:50–17:52] than a lot of other people would.
[17:52–17:56] And we got probably five days after we got tailor.
[17:56–17:57] Wow.
[17:57–18:00] So as soon as Taylor died, I think it was.
[18:00–18:06] Jack like we were distraught Jesus Christ and don't get me wrong like we'd still I was looking at pictures
[18:06–18:10] The Taylor on the phone the other night we quave and the toast for sobbing like we'd still cry over yeah
[18:10–18:15] She's our fourth dog in the house. We have her little ashes in the we got her permission
[18:15–18:20] And she has her ashes under the tally so when we're watching tally we look at her every night
[18:21–18:23] but
[18:23–18:25] I think yeah, I think was my brother Jackie I
[18:26–18:31] I think he Googles like boxers for sale land like he was like I can't yeah
[18:31–18:39] So anymore like I've pictures the next I think it was the next day or the next morning of Taylor's bed still in the kitchen and I remember sent it into the family chat being like
[18:40–18:47] The house is just not the same. Yeah, not the same. So we we got Bobby five days after we got Taylor or at five days after Taylor
[18:47–18:49] past away we got Bobby and
[18:50–18:56] But like that was our way of of dealing with it with the loss of Taylor. Yeah people do differently. Yeah
[18:56–18:58] You hear some people
[18:58–19:03] Saying and my dad probably even said at the time he was like I could never go through that again my dad
[19:04–19:10] Yeah, we all were but you hear people saying I could never I'm never getting a dog again because I don't want to deal with losing them again
[19:10–19:12] Yeah, mm-hmm. That didn't really work
[19:12–19:17] But our way of dealing with it was kind of like listen we gave Taylor a great life for 12 years
[19:17–19:19] Why can't we give another dog? Yeah
[19:19–19:24] Another great life like that and our we were so used to having a dog in the house and
[19:26–19:29] I think that was it wasn't yeah, we just that was our way of yeah
[19:29–19:33] Everyone is different. Not even grief with pets but grief with people grief with anything
[19:33–19:40] Yeah, everyone does with a so different. He's off it means like if it means you think and another dog will help you
[19:40–19:43] You'll know yourself. It means you think and that another dog will either help you
[19:43–19:49] Are not or hinder you like you'll you'll know you'll know whether you'll be putting yourself
[19:49–19:53] backwards or not and if you think you can give another dog a
[19:54–19:59] Lovely home. I don't see why not like yeah, I like there's so many dogs out there who need so many homes
[19:59–20:02] And it doesn't replace them but it feels that boy
[20:02–20:05] Oh, yeah, there'd be nothing in the house and it'd be in dead silence
[20:05–20:10] Yeah, but it never was never ever to replace Taylor and we knew that but that's why we also said we wanted a boy
[20:10–20:14] Is a Taylor's girl. Yeah, but we we knew that it wasn't to replace Taylor
[20:15–20:19] Like nobody or face her. She was the funniest little woman ever but like
[20:19–20:21] Yeah, that was we just
[20:21–20:24] New week again another dog a good life
[20:25–20:29] We knew we wanted a boxer will never know how boxers in the house, but um
[20:29–20:31] Yeah, that was just kind of
[20:32–20:38] Hey, we dealt with it. We cried. We looked at pictures. We we have it like mask her. It's not
[20:40–20:42] Who got that made from
[20:43–20:47] memory car you crying the hell is crying you are crying on the alarm
[20:48–20:53] No, yeah, we've pictures of her everywhere. Her head is like a shrine
[20:53–20:55] Taylor Kelly it really is godlover
[20:56–21:01] Yeah, just remember the magic can and like I said if you think and another dog will help you
[21:01–21:05] I would highly recommend it or if you think you just need time to just really
[21:06–21:13] Greve yeah, it's like don't be afraid to grieve because it is like a person. Oh my so what is it? It's an animal you knew for
[21:14–21:15] 12 years
[21:15–21:22] Yeah, we had Taylor like I still remember the day Taylor came home and like oh she was our first dog
[21:22–21:27] We like she was all I knew growing up and the names we had for an all grown up was a bit mad
[21:27–21:31] I don't know why we'd never call our dogs by their actual names Taylor's name was Taylor
[21:31–21:33] But we call her boo boo or me me
[21:33–21:35] Yeah, yeah, yeah
[21:35–21:42] Or cats is that Bobby is Bobby what we call him Bob a Lena. Yeah, like Tom believe I don't remember my dog getting for down really
[21:42–21:48] That I don't yeah, I'm glad as in a word way I'm glad I was with her when she like
[21:49–21:54] Obviously she's in her face like we're on crime. I don't like I'd be able to see because I've heard of people who
[21:56–21:59] Don't do that who their parents have
[21:59–22:04] Have brought the dog away got the dog put down while they were in school and they come back from school and the dog just gone
[22:04–22:10] I think that's oh yeah, I know. Yeah. Oh god. I cordoned. I think I think if the dog is a family dog and like
[22:11–22:16] You know everyone needs to be involved. I don't think you could you should make depending on how young the kids are okay
[22:16–22:18] I kind of understand but also like
[22:18–22:24] Oh, no, yeah, they're funny for the child of a meltdown. Yeah, we don't have a meltdown either way
[22:24–22:28] Yeah, so I'd rather the child no, yeah, but yeah, no, I'm glad I was there
[22:28–22:31] I got it over yeah, and she's at home now. I shouldn't tell you what was
[22:32–22:35] Sweetie. She's in the podcast studio. Yeah
[22:36–22:39] If you send your lemons to home I drink acrolegne.com
[22:39–22:43] New episodes of home and you can extroge come every Monday and our main episode are on Wednesday
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[22:49–22:51] Bye
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